Heart Break

About a year and a half ago I lost a piece of something very special to me. It was a piece of the mother I had once known. Her stroke was like a thief in the night that robbed part of her memory, speech, and reasoning. In a flash part of her was lost forever. Now each sub sequential day I stand by and watch while bits and pieces are vanishing before my eyes. Her once beautiful smiles have turned to images of confusion, defeat, and an emptiness that is heartbreaking. Her eyes, which once were bright, are filled with tears of sorrow, misunderstandings, and frustration. Almost every word I speak to her is taken as a personal attack. She believes I am angry with her, dislike her and do not love her. I do not speak and I’m uncaring. I can hardly take the torture and heartbreak my words seem to induce. I am at a loss. I pray that somewhere in her mind she knows I love her, and I am so sorry. I am sorry I can’t make you understand I love you, I miss you, and you are my world. I am terrified you will leave this world and the last thoughts you have of me are I don’t love you. I pray to God to clear your mind, if only for a little while so you will know we all love you.